Same Old Stuff

At least I have a funny story to tell, so I'll start with that. My week started on Wednesday on the movie The Bucket List starring Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson. All I have to say is that Jack Nicholson is the coolest mofo on the planet. Seriously. Morgan Freeman wasn't there that day. Jack was talking with all of us and joking around. He is really funny, amazingly talented and just really cool. He is exactly the way I want to be when I make it to the big time. I want to be cool, approachable and I want people to think I'm a genuinely nice guy. I don't want to be mean and cold in real life and then go on talk shows and be all smiley and phoney like a lot of the actors I've mentioned in previous posts. The day was a short day, but I met a crazy and I'll tell you about that now.

Geez, I swear I don't know where people get their information or why they tell it to STRANGERS! Anyway, I'm sitting there, and there is a lady behind me talking about colon cleansing. Given that I am a medical student, my ears perk up to see what kind of false information she is going to tell these other people. She's telling these people that she stopped eating meat because meat has parasites in it blah blah blah. She then says that its a good idea to have a colon cleanse once a year. She recommends an herbal colon cleanse because certain herbs can kill parasites that live within us, according to her. Up to this point, I'm thinking "whatever". Personally, I think all you need is some fiber, vegetables and a lot of water to clean yourself out. What she said next is what made me turn around and gasp. These are her exact words:

"I know that the herbs work to kill parasites and the illnesses that they cause.
I had a friend who had cancer, and the doctors gave her some pills, but they didn't
do anything. You know those doctors, they give you stuff to keep you sick so you
have to keep coming back and giving them money! So, my friend took some of the
herbal colon cleanse pills. Now, not to be gross, but this is true. After she took the
pills, a spider crawled out of her vagina, and then
her cancer disappeared completely"

WTF????? Spider? Vagina? What does that have to do with cancer? Is this woman nuts? You know I was cracking up so hard, for many reasons. 1). She was probably referring to herself and not her "friend". 2). In order for a spider to crawl out of your vagina, that means it had to crawl in there!! YUCK!! The digestive system and the reproductive system are completely separate and not connected in any way, so her whole lead in to this story was basically BS. Vaginas just don't create spiders. 3). Can you imagine the look on ANYONE'S face if a *BLEEPING* spider crawled out of their vagina??? This is ludicrous!!! You should have seen the look on the other people's faces. It was straight up comedy. I couldn't contain myself. Someone said, "A spider, like a real spider?" Then the lady changed it up again and said it was a "spider-like creature". How does she know all these details? I'm sorry, but if a damn spider really crawled out of someone's vagina, I can't imagine them telling anybody. I mean, how do you tell someone that a freakin spider crawled out of your vagina?!?!?!?!?!?! "Hey Betty, my period was a little weird yesterday. It was extra heavy and there was something moving around in there. Is that normal? Ahhhhh........for the love of God!!! I know I sound all shocked right now, because I really was, but honestly, I thank God for these people. How BORING would my life and blogs be if it were not for my crazies?!

Wow.....I don't even have anything to say after that story. I'm glad it happened or else this blog would be really short because I only worked 2 days this week. There are some changes that will be happening soon I hope, and hopefully next week I'll have some interesting things to say. You know I don't like to say anything until things are set in stone. That way I don't look stupid if things change, ya know what I mean?

Positive quote for the day:

"People who succeed keep open minds and are afraid of nothing"

~Napoleon Hill

Well, I got the open mind part down......I just gotta work on the "afraid of nothing" part!